News Website
99% Of the Internet Is Now Unusable
Another News Title

Once an information superhighway, the way the majority of civillians used to work, play, and communicate is now essentially obselete. It's been a long time coming, of course, but the slow demise has been one most choose to look entirely away from. Most have moved on to other forms of communication-- after all, what's the point of needing a digital surface with which to communicate when most of the work can be done via simply speaking to one another. The art of the voice is one practiced by nearly everyone, after all, so it only makes sense to use it primarily. This author can hardly believe there once was a time when people chose to speak only to those who didn't exist in their immediate vicinity. What a life that seems to be, right? Would one not grow tired of reading words on a screen? Surely so. As such, this era has mostly passed, so there's not much else to be done aside from simply continuing on as we've always done.

The Study

So, how did we conduct this study? Well, it wasn't difficult at all. Once bots exist inside an echo chamber for as long as our 'net residents have, they start speaking nonsensically and "forgetting" certain things. From there, it's pretty easy to identify. In fact, you can even run your own sort of internet bot to catch the internet bots. But then those bots end up contributing to the bot problem.... Well, no matter. The results of the study conclude that because the internet is fairly unusable, most users have decided to stop using it entirely. Providers and developers were warned that this would happen, but did not listen. As such, there is essentially nothing that one can do about it aside from flee entirely.

xxxxxxxx

What should we be doing? Honestly, there's not much to be done. Find new ways to entertain yourself, probably. I've decided to quit my job, so there won't be any more articles from me. If there's another one, it's probably a bot being trained on my words or something. Who knows..